~*Dorothy was right, there's no place like home*~

I embarked on this journey to Korea with the intention on creating change in my life. I needed to get away. After a failed relationship, personal problems and graduating and not working in the field I intended, I started to feel aimless. (but now in hindsight, I know it was all worth it) Almost as if I was existing and not really living. My smile was starting to fade (which means change was necessary), because anybody that knows me, knows that there are two things you can always see me with: I always smile and I always wear a flower in my hair. It's my own simple way of inviting in happiness. Nonetheless, life in America just wasn't fun anymore. Of course, I had my family and friends but I had this urge to explore. To just pick up, buy a ticket to a new place and try to start a new life. Maybe you can say I was running away. But, I think of it as creating a new opportunity to manifest happiness. Afterall, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. But I've said all this to say: I did it. Korea opened up the doors of opportunity and the happiness has been flooding in. I cannot even put into words the love, joy and freedom I feel here in Korea. Sometimes it seems so unreal. 

But, after being here for 8 months I was really starting to feel home sick. Not the kind of homesick that can be cured with a Skype conversation (although Skype saves my life every day). But the kind where I wanted to hug those people I talk to on Skype everyday, hug them so tightly and never let go. So, I bought a ticket home and I left two weeks later. Finally the day came when I was leaving. I stayed at my best friend's (so lucky to have her here, but I'll save that story for another entry) house the night before (because I knew I'd surely miss her, although I made up some excuse to stay over. opps maybe I shouldn't have wrote that since I'm sure she'll be reading this). And when I was heading to the airport, tears just stated flowing. I have no idea why. I guess I was just ready to get "home."

After 16 hours of traveling, three lay overs and a million and one security checks I was finally in Miami, FL!! My family met me there and all I could think was "Wow, I'm actually home!" It seemed so unreal. I was overwhelmingly happy to be back in the place I had "ran" from, just 8 months prior. Nonetheless, it felt so good to hug my family and just look at them in person. 

While at home I did all the things I could never do in Korea. I enjoyed foods that only exist in books in Korea and I reconnected with most of the people I love. (a week was too short to see everyone) 

In my 216 hours, 12, 960 mins or 777,600 secs (yes I calculated. It was that important.)

I: Read signs in English, just because they were in English. Walked on the beach. Talked to random strangers, just because they spoke English. Spent the night with a new friend. I had like 30 lunch dates. Kissed. Cried with my sister. Took random pictures. Partied hard with my girls. Sat on a balcony (we don't have those in Korea). Had like 20 heart to hearts. Shopped (like a lot). Connected with a new friend. Met the most beautiful person, and kept wondering why we had never met before. Gave a way gifts.Went to church. Held hands. Visited Tallahassee. Got a million compliments. Walked around Lake Ella under the moon light. Hugged my sisters for what felt like forever (best feeling). Connected with my family like never before. Dinner with one of my best friends. Enjoyed "easy conversations." Cried. Watched T.V. Listened to Pandora (man I wish it worked in Korea.) Took long showers. Smiled. Wore flowers in my hair. Saw her. Got my hair braided by one of my best friends. Ate my favoritest Jamaican dish ever: curry chicken and fried plantains. Walked around Publix (I love that place). Met a really sweet worker in Publix. Sunday Dinner with my family. Had a friend cook a special dish for me. Listened to new music. Drove with the windows down, while blasting my music. Caked (all the lovers out there know what I'm talking about). Talked on Skype. Had a random person call me beautiful. Laughed so hard until I couldn't breathe. Sang my heart out while driving. Hugged my mentor (great feeling). Picked flowers. Watched families interact. Chased a butterfly.

*And it's interesting because the whole time I was home, everyone kept telling me that I was glowing and how good I looked. Maybe it was because I had my smile back. I guess Korea does a girl good :-)

So I guess the saying is true: There is absolutely no place in the world like home. I've traveled to many countries, but I have yet to find another place that I can call home.

I'm starting to feel like a real Teacher :)

Wow, I realized that I have not updated my blog in over three months. Yikes, all I can say is that life really has been picking up and I have been living my life like it's g o l d e n. Things have really taken off in the last few months and I've discovered a higher level of happiness that I didn't even know was possible. And I've just been living life like it's G O L D E N.

I'm not sure when the change happened. Perhaps it was gradual, but today I had a moment and I thought to myself: Wow, I really am a teacher and I''m making a real difference. Maybe it's all of the sweet little notes that my students give me. Or perhaps it's when I see my students' English skills getting better and better every week. It could even be when my boss told me that she specifically wanted her daughter in my class ( I'm guessing that must be a compliment.) Nonetheless, whatever the reason may be. I'm really enjoying being a teacher. It has been quite a unique experience. I'm looking forward to more epic adventures with my Korean babies, as I call them :)

My school made posters to advertise some of our classes and they put me on the poster :)

*~Soul Connections in Seoul*~

Establishing human connections is perhaps our most valuable ability/gift on Earth. Lately I've been meeting some amazing people and making some real soul connections in Seoul.. In quiet reflection, I began to think about my relationships with others and I have come to understand how those connections have played [and still are playing] a major role in my life.

I realize that in life it's easy to become so distracted and occupied with work, school, things and just life that we may neglect the relationships in our lives. But, when we go home from work or school and we put those things down, the most important thing in life is our connections to others. Human relationships and connections are so beautiful. Yet, often very difficult to establish and maintain. Creating relationships becomes difficult when we are afraid or when we hold back and push others away for fear of being hurt.  Fear is a like a snake that easily slithers into our lives, it can cause us to create these self-imposed prisons that we don't know how to get out of and we don't know how to let others in. Sometimes, we've been so hurt that we build walls without even knowing that we are isolating ourselves from the world and perhaps missing out on creating some beautiful relationships.

I don't want to fall into the trap of fear. I realize that creating relationships and establishing connections is usually a risk. It means that I will have to allow myself be vulnerable, but I'm ok with that. Alicia Keys said it best "I'd risk the fall, just to know how it feels to fly."  The 'seoul' purpose of life is to be happy, but what is happiness if we have no one to share it with?

I'm spreading my wings and flying...not worrying or operating in fear. I'm just living to create meaningful relationships [friendships] where I can give love and let love in :) I'm so thankful for all of the beautiful people I've had an opportunity to meet and cross paths with in Korea. Each of them have played a role in helping me to continuously evolve into a beautiful woman. It has been an amazing experience [and I've only been here for a about 4 months] that I will carry with me for a lifetime. I'm looking forward to the rest of the surprises that will unfold while I'm living my dreams in Korea; if the rest of my time here is anything like the beginning then I'm in for a real treat :)
*Happiness feels so good*

Korean Children say the darnest things...

A special moment with one of my students. Well on the last day of term one of my students told me that she would really miss me and she wrote me this note: (I'm going to type it exactly the way that she wrote it in her Konglish [Korean English] it's so cute)

To Derrika:
Thank you for to safe in many big trouble.
I'm always thankful to you.
I don't meet the good teacher like you.
I'm happy when I'm studying with you in your class.
You are so good teacher.
I am thanks to the God because I met you and have lots of good happy memory.
Goodbye Derrika.
From, Your student Sally.
Have a nice day!! Don't give up!!

*When I read this I was definitely near tears. Sally was one of my best students. She really inspired me and taught me a lot, I'm just glad I was able to share my spirit with her :)

Some funny moments I have had with my students:

1. One of my students randomly told me during a class [in this class I was teaching the children about modern slavery]:

Student: "Teacher you're the Black"[he had the most worried look as he said this]

Me: umm....yes I am.... [laughing on the inside]

Student: But the slaves are the black. I don't want my teacher to be a slave.

Me: Don't worry slavery is over and I'm here to be your teacher :)

Student [sigh of relief. He looked so serious lol] ok I'm happy.

2. If you talk to any ESL Teacher I'm sure they will tell you that students ask WHY for EVERYTHING. But the funny part is that they ask why for the most random things. So one day I was trying to teach my students a little slang, but clearly they did not get it. The conversation went something like this:

Me: Emma stop being such a hater

Emma: "Oh but teacher why?"

Me: Hating is not a good look.

Emma: But why? I didn't know hate has a looks. [she literally said it like this lol]

Me: I don't mean it literally.

Emma: why? Teacher I look cute!

3. Me: How was your visit to Australia? What did you do that was fun?

Student: I ate the Koala meat

Me: ....oh...really?? People eat....Koala? [looking very confused because I was expecting an answer like I went swimming or I went shopping.]

Student: Don't worry teacher I had fun. It was joke. [student laughing]

Me: uhhh ok [i was just confused lol]

As you can see I'm enjoying my experience teaching in Korea! It's not always easy and there are definitely some challenging students. But, I must say this experience is definitely worth it :)

Oppps I almost forgot...I'm an English Teacher!!

So I realize that I have neglected to write a blog post about what I actually do here in Korea. I have been so wrapped up in all of my enjoyment of Korea I forgot that to write about what I actually do here! So, I moved to Korea to become an ESL Teacher. ESL Teacher's are very popular here, because many students want to learn English. Actually, English is required by many Korean schools and many students have to take an English test along with their college admissions applications. So basically learning English is pretty important and I'm kind of a big deal as an English Teacher :)

I plant seeds of knowledge & watch them grow

 In Korea, students usually learn English in two settings: Public School and Hagwons. Hagwons are English academies where students go to learn English after school. It's very similar to a tutoring program, but it's a bit more structured. I work at a Hagwon and I must say I really enjoy it :) I think the best part of this job is that I come in contact with so many different students in one day.I have met some really amazing students that have taught me more than I could ever teach them. It's funny how teaching is such a cyclical process, in the process of teaching my students I learn lessons that cannot be found in a book and I'm forever grateful to my students for that :) My students have given this quote so much value: 

"By learning you will teach, by teaching you will learn." - Latin Proverb

A glimpse of my travels in Korea!

A beautiful Sunset

I saw the most beautiful sunset while visiting the Seoul Tower (in Seoul, South Korea). It was absolutely gorgeous. The sun looked like it was a blazing fire of red and orange hues. My friends Toya, Lisa, Gary and I decided to take a trip to the Seoul Tower. After hiking up a hill and a million endless steps we finally made it to the tower. And It was definitely worth it. The view was breath-taking. 

As I looked out over the city and saw the sun setting I could only smile. Being a writer I find metaphors for life in everything. The sunset seemed to represent a recent ending in my life. [See last blog post] Though endings are hard they give birth to a more beautiful beginning. I'm excited about this new beginning because it has already started off so well. I closed the last chapter and now I'm creating a new one of unlimited love and happiness. As I walked around the tower and saw all of the beautiful scenery I was thinking "Wow I still can't believe I'm actually living in Korea." But I'm definitely living here and loving it! :)

Also at the Seoul tower they have a gate of heart locks where couples go and put hearts on a gate to represent their love. Its such a sweet romantic gesture. I could only smile as I looked at all of the hearts scribbled with promises of love. They also had a wall of tiles where couples wrote their wishes and proclamations of love on tiles. I think its so beautiful the way they celebrate love here. Maybe one day I will be able to put a heart on the lock gate to proclaim my love to the person I plan to share the rest of my life with :)

Picnic Time

This past weekend our company hosted a picnic for all of it's different schools throughout Korea. So after clubbing the night before me and Toya (my friend from the states) struggled to wake up and go. I'm so glad we decided to get up and go, it was well worth it. The sun was shining so beautifully and the weather was amazing. When we got to the park I was so excited, we were finally starting to get a dose of spring in Korea. It had been so cold here all through out the month of April so the warm weather was so exciting.

The picnic turned out to be nice. We had a chance to enjoy some food from back home (hotdogs, hamburgers, BBQ chicken) and we hung out with friends. We also decided to go for a paddle boat ride (my idea) but we clearly almost died in the process lol. It was a little windy so the boat kept swaying. It's funny now but at the time it wasn''t. All I kept thinking is "I cannot fall in this water and mess up my favorite jeans!" Luckily we didn't fall in! And then we had a chance to take some really beautiful pictures, because they park had beautiful scenery :)

 

~*Season's Change*~

As I was walking to work today I saw beautiful Magnolias in full bloom. The leaves on trees were finally turning green and the sun was shining so beautifully. I was so excited to see that we are finally on the verge of spring in Korea. The season's are changing {not just in the weather, but in my life} Leaving behind this bitter winter with a promising spring on the horizon. 

This winter was perhaps one of the coldest winter's in Korea and ironically it was one of the coldest winter's in my life. It seemed like everything was falling apart. And every time I thought I was finally getting it together something else would go wrong. I was at a point in my life where I was questioning everything and trying to make sense of all of the things that were happening. But I started to realize that maybe it's true that somethings fall apart so other things can fall together. And maybe sometimes we think everything is going wrong when in reality we are just being prepared to be elevated to the next level of life.

But thankfully seasons change. 

Season's change and give us the opportunity to enter a new place in life. And I gladly welcome this new season in my life. It has already started out so beautifully with this move to Korea. A new start. New friends (still miss all the old ones). A new job. A new outlook. And a new me. Since being here I've really began to create the kind of happiness I was longing to have. {So glad my family and friends really supported me in my decision to move}

I've been able to reflect on all of the heartbreak, betrayal, frustration, fear and baggage I picked up in the winter of 2009 and I have simply released it. Pain has a special way of putting us in a kind of self-imposed prison, where we begin to wallow in self-pity and get caught up in negativity. I knew I had to make some changes or else I would become a prisoner of the past. So I {with the strength of GOD} dried up my tears and took control. I've been meditating, praying and learning to forgive which has truly given me the ability to let go and move forward. 

Letting go all of that excess baggage makes me feel so free. Now I can smile and really feel it and mean it. I can love without expecting anything in return. I can give kindheartedly. I can live freely. I can be happy without feeling guilty. And I can live in a happiness I never knew  existed. Sometimes we never know how strong we are until we look back and say "Wow I don't know how I made it through that?" (But deep down I know GOD carried me through and put special people in my life to help me through it. Thank you)

GOD really knows how to set up a blessing. I can now look back and put all the pieces together. I know that I went through all of those things so I could learn some valuable lessons, develop strength and test my pretty wings. And now I'm discovering a happiness that I cannot even put into words and flying my pretty wings around...

Seasons change.

And this season has changed for the best. Things may not be perfect, but I'm living my dreams in love, peace and freedom :)